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Married & I think he regrets it
So my husband and I just recently got married, in fact it'll be one month tomorrow.. we did a courthouse ceremony because I am pregnant.. we were engaged a few months prior and obviously knew marriage was in the works and that we both wanted it. We decided on the courthouse now because we're having a baby and because of personal beliefs as well as religious ones, we want to be married for the sake of our child. I knew this when we decided to do it, but I also was SO thrilled to be marrying my best friend. I love him so much, even when he's a pain in my ass! Of course we have our differences and what not but personally I've been trying to work on myself because I've been known to say some really harsh things in the heat of the moment (that I NEVER mean) but they just come out because he'll make me upset and hurt my feelings and I always knew just what to say to hurt his.. but, I've changed that.. at least I've been trying. Anyway, today we were genuinely just messing around today (or so I thought) sometimes were just mean but joking about it.. and I didn't even say anything bad, and then he just blurts out "l haven't liked you for so long! It's ridiculous, honestly I hate you sometimes" so I said "okay why did you propose and then marry me?" And he said "I did it for the baby and I can see now that it was a mistake" and I just said "wow ok" and then I proceeded to cry for several hours.
He has yet to apologize so I've just not acknolowged him... I don't know if he meant that or not.. but honestly I could see how that's actually the truth.. because for a while he jus seems to get easily annoyed with me, and not very intimate anymore.. so of course I started thinking of all that and it only made me feel worse... it's like times like these where he become so mean and harsh and then he doesn't apologize or even seem to feel any sort of guilt and then I feel horrible.
I'm carrying this mans baby, one that was planned out of love, and now he just says stuff like this and it makes me sick to my stomach. I was even feeling our daughter kicking the whole time I was crying and it just made me feel worse... if he actually does feel this way, then I'm bringing her into a false marriage and possibly a future divorce? I won't stay with someone just for my child... will I try to work on it, yes, but if he doesn't even love me? That's wrong for me.. & a bad example for my future daughter.