32 weeks and feeling more anxiety then anything

I'm on my third kid. I have to have a c section and the whole thing is making me flip out .  I have a 12 year old and a 6 year with my ex husband been divorced for 3 years I went through hell and back and I refuse to go through it again. this is my bf first I was so happy actually we were both happy now he says all these comments to me at random times like I should've had a kid with someone who has no baggage and constantly telling me I need to eat less and work out more like I use to. Then last night I was turned away I'm guessing he thought I was asleep and he says I hope you don't stay this fat and my heart just broke I wanted to cry but I was taught never to cry in front of a man so I got up 5 min later went into the restroom and cried I'm 31 years old and he is 29 . I honestly thought he was the one until he started making comments to me at 28 weeks pregnant I guess when he started getting embarrassed by me . I'm sad lonely and don't know what to do and scared of raising my son that's is coming next month alone .