so depressed

May 22, 2017 he love of my life was shot and killed. And I know it's only been a week and I wouldn't be over it anytime soon, but I feel like it's not getting any easier or better. I cry constantly, always! I haven't ate or slept, I'm just so angry, sad, depressed, lost just all messed up. I had only been with him for five months but it was the best five months of my life, the happiest I had ever been. Some days I feel like I'll never make it, but I have three babies that give me all the reason I need. I feel like everyone that we're close to me, weren't really there for me and very insensitive to my loss. I had a lot of others reach out to me though via Facebook, and I am so grateful because without the outpouring support I probably wouldn't have made it through the week. It's just so hard not being able to text him, call him, see him I'm so used to him always being available! He was my bestfriend, nobody has ever loved me as he has, been a friend to me as he has, took care of me as he has. He had done so much for me and my boys, he was always there when we needed him, he always made sure we were cool.  For the first time ever I genuinely felt loved, I know his love was genuine. I don't know how too be better. I guess I just needed to vent 😢