Crazy/Funny Masturbation Stories?

These can sometimes be the best and funniest stories, or the most painful! What are your guys' funniest, weirdest, or craziest stories?

I got the idea to make this post because this just happened to me the other day! I was on my period, so I decided to "do the deed" in the shower. I had the music on and everything. I wasn't really feeling it, so it took a lot longer than usual. Then finally, right, and I mean right as I finally got up to my orgasm... the shower curtain falls down on top of me. 😐😐 I was honestly laughing so hard and trying to fix it before anyone walked in 😂

What's your story?