Does anyone else still feel guilty they couldn't breastfeed?

Question

I only managed breast/formula feed my son for his first 3.5 weeks of his life due to a tongue tie and I still feel guilty I couldn't. When will this feeling go? I wish I knew more about it when he was first born and blame myself for that as I feel if I could do it all again I would try more. I was very self cautious about it all and maybe if I had attended all the support groups I could have learned with the support. Am I always going to feel guilty? I know some mums don't want to breastfeed and choose formula straight from the start so don't have regrets cause they never waned to do it. But because I failed I think I'm feeling even guiltier. Anyone else feel like this?

Answer

I read a recent study saying that in newer studies they found no significant difference in cognitive development between breastfed and formula fed babies (contradicting some earlier studies). so the pressure and guilt around how you feed your baby is misplaced. that made me feel a lot better, as I was an underproducer, and only made it to 10 weeks of pumping.

Answer

I made it to 9.5 months with my daughter before my supply just totally bottomed out. I think it's the fact that I couldn't stop on my own terms that depresses me the most. But at the end of the day my daughter is healthy and thriving. Mom guilt sucks but it has eased for me. This is one of the reasons we have alternatives.

Answer

You fed your baby - that is all that matters.  Be proud of what you have accomplished and love that you have for your kiddo.

Answer

my baby also had a tongue tie which wasn't divided until he was 4 weeks old. I had so much support right from the beginning, but he just couldn't latch because of it. he really struggled even to bottle feed because of it. I expressed until after he had it sorted with the hope that he would then be able to latch.  Unfortunately though my milk supply was awful. I think the issue in the UK is that there are lot of babies born with tongue ties (I was recently told as many as 8/10!) and not enough midwives trained to divide them. with most babies having to wait at least 4 weeks it's no surprise that people really struggle with breastfeeding.  I have felt guilty at times but I know it's irrational as it was largely out of my control! what I find hard is people assuming I didn't try hard.

Does anyone else still feel guilty they couldn't breastfeed?

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