Paranoid in having my baby around so many people?!

My baby's father mother wants my son and to go spend the day over their house., mind you my baby's father has never reached out to know about his son, all of this has been his mom.

So I went their two weeks ago, so my son could meet her and she gave him gifts. Now she wants me to go back there because she wants to present my son to his whole family. I have never met these people,- and I don't even know how many people will be there. Also it's a surprise she told me, so whoever is sick won't even know not to go because no one will be expecting a baby to be there.

I do want my son to know his father's family that is the reason why I reached out to them. I just feel like I'm sacrificing a lot when the actual father doesn't even ask about his son.

The mother doesn't even have a car seat base, so I have to remove mine to install it back again.

They don't have any thing for the baby, so I have to take all his things with me. Yes his mom will pick me up, but that is a lot of things to move around. And also I am still breastfeeding so I don't feel 100% to breastfeed in front of that many people.

Am I being overly paranoid? And what should I say to the mother so she doesn't feel bad if I decide not to go ( I already kind of hinted that I was bec I felt bad saying no).

Please if anyone could help. Thanks!