Feeling down lately.

I do not have suicidal thoughts, but more of a "would anyone even really care if I was gone?" Type of thought, I would never harm myself, but the thoughts get me so depressed. I know everyone is busy and it's hard to get together with family, but with everyone I know, I always feel like I'm the one reaching out, and trying to keep relationships going. I don't have a ton of girlfriends, just three, but I haven't even seen them in months, as they say they are always busy. I hate nagging and complaining, and am really just looking for advice. I need to get out of this rut of always feeling so sad and alone. Thanks everyone 💕💕