So my boyfriend and I have been together for almost 3 years now. We've known each other for about 8/9 years and dated on and off during high school. There has been times where plans that we make change because he wants to do something else with his friends, or he just forgets. He constantly plays games on his phone whenever we're together. But when he's not on his phone all he tries to do is have sex. He also watches porn a lot which I have told him multiple times I found very disrespectful and degrading. If he's with me he shouldn't need to watch porn? But he just complains we don't have enough sex. When I tell him we have too much and I don't want our relationship to just be about sex. We never really do anything or go out anymore because he complains that everything costs money. And if we do something, or he finally does something for me he expects sex in return for it. Where I do everything for him, all the little things that I think matter but sometimes I don't think matters to him. And I don't get any of the little things in return. He does a lot for me helping out financially. But like I said always expects something out of it and just takes advantage of it all.
Going on almost 3 years I feels it's about time to start the next step in our relationship. But I can't even talk to him about getting engaged, marriage, or having kids without him getting upset and mad and then it turns into an argument. I can never tell him how I'm feeling without him getting mad either. All he worries about is money and wants to make sure he has all the money he needs before we can do anything. I understand you need money, but I'm not asking to get married tomorrow, and have kids next week. I just want to know that we can still grow in this relationship together and want the same things. But he doesn't seem to want any of this at the same time that I want it. I want to be married and start having kids within the next few years. Where as he wants to wait another 5 or 6 years. I feel like I've run out of energy trying to talk to him about the things I want and why. Because he doesn't try to understand it. He just gets mad and wants it his way only.
I've talked to a few friends and my mom about this and how I've been feeling. They have all said I shouldn't keep putting myself through this when I can find someone who wants the same things I do out of a relationship. Someone who enjoys me and just spending time with me. Rather then someone who doesn't pay attention to me being on their phone all the time but then wants sex all the time when they aren't in their phone. I just feel like I have no more energy and I don't know what to do anymore. He's always been a great friend and I don't want to hurt him. But I don't want to hurt anymore either.