My SO is 16 (he’ll be 17 in December) I’m 17. We have a little boy, he’s 2 months and 5 days and the sweetest thing I’ve ever laid eyes on. Anywho, I had TERRIBLE postpartum depression the first week he was born. When my milk came in, i hit rock bottom.. I told my SO that I knew in my mind that I loved them but I couldn’t feel anything, and I was numb. After my boobs swelled down, I was okay again (I’m still very depressed but I’m taking it day by day). But he has used that against me every single argument we have now and it makes me feel so low. A little back story for us.. we met when I was in the 8th (I’ll be graduating this year) but we just became bestfriends because he had a someone and so did i. I saw him in school one day (we stopped talking for a bit after his girlfriend told him we were to close) and we started texting and she cheated on him and they broke up and we texted for a while before I gave him a chance. Our relationship was so good in the beginning.. he spoiled me with love and affection (and gifts every now and then) and we communicated very well but with us being in high school and his jealous ex (and mine) rumors started and we started arguing a lot more (which was expected) but we worked through it. He slipped up a couple times and I did once but we worked through it. All was well until he got comfortable I guess, he started ignoring me, staying out late, go missing all day, sometimes even a full day. And I honestly was getting so tired of it but I had fell pregnant (my son is the love of my life and I could never ever regret him). It didn’t get ANY better my whole pregnancy. I moved in with him but we argued constantly, he never spent ANY time with me, and he was putting his friends before me every.single.day. He smokes weed (daily) enough to the point where he can’t eat really unless he has smoked because he has HORRIBLE nerves. He is AMAZING with our baby boy.. when he’s home. But I’m the one that watches our babyboy all night, I have been since the 2 weeks he was born. It doesn’t matter how exhausted I am, he doesn’t even bother to ask if I want to sleep for a bit or anything. He leaves to go do something with his friends and he says it’ll be one thing but he ends up being gone for hours and then will come home and I’ll ask where he’s been and what not and he’ll blow up on me and say “I always bitch at him” and “why do you think I always leave, you bitch at me everytime I’m home” he’s recently gotten a job and he works 24/7 because he friend works there as well. He works double shifts and even when he does get off, he’ll go to his friends house til two in the morning. He finally had an off day today and I had arranged for our boy to go to my god moms for the day so we could spend some time together and we were supposed to take our boy to the petting zoo before we dropped him off and he had me up til 5 something just staring and smiling (so precious) and he woke back up and 9:40 ish to be fed and was up since then (took a few cat naps) and I was exhausted. My SO slept til 1 something and we stayed up till 2:40 ish but I asked him if he’d watch the baby while I napped a bit and I slept till 4 and I woke up and he was handing me my boy and told me he was going to the store and back. He came back an hour and a half later and we took our boy to my god moms and came home for an hour or so and he wanted to leave again (mind you he said the day before that we’d be spending the day together but he’s said this a lot, I should’ve known not to believe it) and ofcourse I got upset and he started calling me bitches, annoying, telling me to shut up, and asking me “what the f I do for our son”. He was just going on and on and I was saying he chooses not to be home and he is gone a lot and the fact that he lies about where all he’s going and stays gone a while and ofcourse he blows up and throws stuff then leaves again and he didn’t get back till a 2:40 am. I’m at my ending point.. I just don’t know what else to do. I want a family so bad, but I just don’t know how much more of this I can take. I grew up in a broken home, I do not want to put my babyboy through that. I love him so much. Is there any advice anyone can give? Anyone been through this sort of thing? He loves our son so much, I know he does.. but he just doesn’t have his priorities straight. Oh and my family isn’t really helpful at all. Me and my mum don’t speak, nor my dad bc of my mum and my siblings have their own things. So if I end up leaving, I will struggle till I can get emancipated and get a home for me and my son. I’m sorry this is so long, I’m just so.. frustrated.