I need advice, idk what to do..

Roshni

So I just got out of a relationship a month ago, it was long distance and he broke it off, it hurt and I’m pretty sure I’m over it now. But we met on tinder, when we broke up I decided to get back on it, and I met this guy who’s great, and funny, and gets me, and idk how to explain it but when we started talking it felt like I knew him for ages and we hung out and we got along so well and we really connected! I like him, and he’s told me he likes me, and we didn’t hook up until yesterday.

And we were talking about our friends and he mentioned my ex’s name, the guy before the most recent ex...Now my ex and I had a toxic, emotionally abusive relationship and he raped me many times and I let it slide and just tried to forget about it because I thought I loved him and I didn’t want to lose him. I know, I don’t wanna hear it, it was wrong and fucked up and it kept fucking me up mentally for a long time that when we stopped seeing each other and he started seeing my best friend (I wasn’t comfortable with it and neither of them seemed to care) I was traumatized and didn’t trust guys and I was pregnant and miscarried after we stopped talking. He’s tried contacting me and shit and I’ve ignored it because I want nothing to do with that cunt. I’m better now because I’m able to have sex now without panicking, mostly because of my most recent ex, he made me feel normal after it and made me feel safe and comfortable. I don’t have evidence against him and I don’t need him to go to jail for my mind to be at peace, I’ve dealt with it and moved on and healed.

Now this guy.. I knew a little about him from my ex but I never knew what he looked like or who he was or anything about him, just that they were best friends. So when he told me they were buddies I had a panicked and started getting dressed cuz we just hooked up and I told the guy what happened without giving him the details (because I don’t like talking about it and also it’s his friend and he doesn’t need to know everything that happened with us, it’s just what I think tbh) and he said he knew that if my ex found out he would be crushed and they would have a massive fight about it. He said he still wants us to keep seeing each other.

Trust me, I know that the fact that they’re friends is enough to just not talk to this guy but he’s different to my ex and he’s better and more understanding and we’ve been talking for ages and I like him, and out of all the guys I’ve talked to he seems to be the only guy I really connect with of that makes sense? Like yesterday was fucking amazing and so fun and so great, I don’t regret it because he is a good person to be around. I just don’t know if it’s the right thing to do. I don’t care about my ex, I don’t want anything to do with him, but I don’t have any alarm bells ringing in my head with this guy. I did with my ex and I didn’t listen and trust my gut, but with this guy, my gut tells me to just go with it because while he’s similar to my ex (they have very similar personalities) he’s still different and understands a fucking no and doesn’t pressure me or anything. It’s good with him and it’s fun. I don’t think we will date yet, I think we’re at the stage where we want to but we’re just going to get to know each other better but I really don’t know if I should keep seeing him. Please give me some advice! I can’t go to my friends because everyone knows everyone in this town because it’s small as fuck. Ugh I’m stuck and I don’t know what to do. 😭😩

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