Urg I wanna be preggers!!!

Feeling so discouraged. Been TTC for about 5-6months now for baby#2.

My boyfriend is not my sons biological father but has pretty much been there since day one. He is very negative about having a baby that is ours because he has like a 1% chance of being able to have a baby due to an accident and hes always getting doscouraged about it and it makes me get discouraged.

I have very irregular periods and just learned(online though) that I might not be ovulating all the time so Im super discouraged.

I never get emotional but I feel like crying right now.

I thought I had a possiblity of being pregnant a few months back because I seemed like I was gaining weight, wanted to eat all the time, had frequent headaches, spotting etc. But took a couple tests and they were negative.

My boyfriend has noticed the past few days my boobs seem bigger and feel more firm and I have a little more milk then usual(havent breastfed for 5months) and I have pimples popping up randomly and I rarely get them and when I do theres 1-2 and I have 4-5. Im super hoping Im pregnant but I dont want to test and it be negative. Plus I can only afford a cheap Wal-Mart one at the moment.

Any advice or anything??