What do y’all think ?

Question

I’m not going to say all girls think about their dream wedding but the majority of girls I have spoken to say they would love to have a wedding, okay ..... so I’ve been with my boyfriend for 7years going on 8 && we do have one child together I brought up the topic on marriage and he said a wedding is a waste of money that’s not something he ever wants to do and that he would rather spend money on a four wheeler .... && that right there had me thinking and shocked like did you really have me be with you for this long and too tell me you never want to get married, but now it’s getting to my head that marriage really isn’t shit but documents.... just how before I wanted another kid later on in the future and he says he’ll no I’m done I just want one and thats it so now I’m like I’m good with one but I always wanted 2 and now all of a sudden I just want 1 I think I’m really letting his life decisions take over mines !  What do y’all think about this ? Is he wrong or right ?

Answer

Well not having a wedding doesnt mean no marriage! I agree with the waste of money. We signed papers at the court house and then had a fun party that night and i wouldn't have it any other way, and my pockets thanked me haha. But i do think you should sit back alone and think what you reallu want..dont let his wants consume you and make you forget about your own.

Answer

You’re letting his decisions effect yours

Answer

only you can make that decision. but i couldnt be with some one who didn't want the same things i do. and if i chose to be with that guy then I'm being selfish to myself. you deserve the life you want. never put someone else's needs before your own unless it's your children's. i hope i helped a little. good luck.

Answer

You’re definitely changing what you want based on what he wants.

Answer

Did he say he doesn’t want marriage? Because a wedding and marriage are two separate things. 
I agree that most women dream of their wedding. I did. And it was big and beautiful. 
Then my dad passed away 2 years ago this month. And those dreams faded for me. He had helped me plan my wedding and without him being there to walk me down the isle, I no longer wanted that dream. It was too heart breaking. My SO completely understood and we canceled the wedding. 
We still want to get married though. We were going to go to the courthouse but I knew it upset my mom. She wanted to walk me down the isle. We compromised on a small family only ceremony in my aunts backyard in NY. But I live in MN currently so we are waiting another year or two before we have the wedding. We just lost our baby at 19 weeks in June and are still grieving. 
Anyways.. I don’t think you should be forced into giving up on something you really want, but I do think you could compromise with him. Have something small and intimate with family only. I can understand him not wanting to spend a lot of money on something for one day, as my SO and I agreed we’d rather use hat money towards a house and starting a family. But him saying he’d rather by a four wheeler is a little immature imo. 
Sit him down and express your feelings on the subject, see if he is willing to compromise.

Answer

you can get married without a wedding, but if you love each other for real, you can find a compromise. if you love someone, you want them to be happy. and sometimes that means compromise. sonetimes it means sacrifice. if you sacrifice your wedding and then hold it against him later, that's not love. just saying.

Answer

We had a wedding, however I wanted to just elope and now my SO agrees we should have eloped.

Answer

I found myself in a similar situation. I understand how incredibly frustrating that feels when you thought y'all were on the same page and now after investing so much love and time together you find out some of your core desires don't line up. I can't tell you what to do but I can tell you he's not taking into account or even asking you what you envision in your future and that is a huge red flag. I would express your goals and wants and you both need to come to an agreement if your relationship can work long term. A good friend of mine gave me some great advice when I was going through the same thing. she told me don't feel pressure from society about your relationship "timeline" people rush into marriage and then divorce a little while later because they didn't take their time and really get to know their partner. But think of your situation at this very point. at this moment, of nothing improved, if nothing changed, would you be happy? Would you remain content? If your answer is yes, then great! If not, then that tells you some things need to change. Good luck!

What do y’all think ?

Let’s Glow

Glow is here for you on your path to pregnancy

25+ million

4.8 stars

20+

Getting Pregnant

Pregnancy

1st Year (Baby & You)

Baby Products