Not your normal porn problem...

So, my S/O and I have a very open sex life. But with a miscarriage, I’ve just been feeling down and rather insecure. Normally, when I give him head, he’ll watch porn because it makes him get off quicker. But tonight, I didn’t want him to watch it. So, I said I’d give him one in the shower, but he didn’t know my reason why. I didn’t wanna ruin the moment or whatever. Well, 30 mind later, he’s still not getting off. I feel like I’m just not enough. And I’m super upset about it. And he is too because he now has blue balls. But then he asked for head in bed to try to finish him, and I asked if he had to have the porn. Then he gets upset even more and says he has problems finishing at that he HAS to have it. That’s why he can’t finish during sex either.. why do I feel like I’m just not enough? Like I just don’t satisfy him? Ughhhhh