Infidelity

Hi ladies.

I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years now. I was 17 when we started dating he was 19.

We are now 20 and 22.

from the beginning of our relationship, he’s kinda been a player. He jumped from his last relationship to me, and I don’t think he was ready to settle down.

Anyways, he literally has cheated on me from day 1. He’s literally put his genitals in other girls genitals, has slept with one of my friends, and left me for a month last year for a girl, and then came running back to me, then left again for her over summer and then had sex with other girls (I guess, what I heard) and then came back. There’s TONS more stories, but this has already made him sound bad enough so I’ll stop here 😅😂😂

The point I’m getting at is, am I wrong for taking him back?? I know I am, but he’s better now.

We haven’t had any problems since summer and he’s sober from alcohol now too, which makes a huge difference in who he is. He hasn’t had interest in cheating.

I think his thing is being alone, or needing the acceptation of other women?? Idk what goes on in these men’s brains. I have done so much in the past for him and it angers me I am stuck around for so long, and still continue to do so.

And sex is a huge issue for me. I have images whenever I try to have sex with him, of him with these other women, and how hurt i was. I love him dearly, but my heart still is broken from 2 years ago/ months ago.

Sometimes I also feel stuck.... he got a DUI after he left me this last time from drinking so much and being around the wrong friends.

He wrecked his vehicle and by law cannot get a license for another 5 yrs. I am his ride back and forth to work now... when I do feel like I want to start over or leave or get a break from him, I can’t. I have to take him to work and be there for him, every morning and every night.

I love him so much and I sometimes don’t know why I do.

and I do know he loves me, he’s such a sweet guy & has shown me love but has also shown me a side of him I hate. You would’ve never known he’s the way he is, because he is just amazing, of course besides what he has done. I know it almost sounds like I’m defending him in the actions, but most def not. Definitely an ass for what he’s done, but crazy how he’s just this nice sweet guy? Honestly can’t explain it and it boggle my mind just as much.

As the years go on, it angers me more as to what he’s done to me.

I’m stuck.

Please tell me some of your similar expirences.