Venting

So as a woman/wife i feel burdened. My husband wants a child and im struggling to give him one. As we sit outside the ivf center i cant help but think of how useless i feel as a woman not being able to reproduce. Dr said i may have endometriosis and need ivf to get pregnant. Where tf am i gonna find $8500 just to get pregnant. I want to cry so bad. Like this hurt im tired of getting all these depressing ass news. I come into these situations so hopeful and leave so defeated. I dont understand why this is happening to me. Im drained and i cant do this no more. Im exhausted life sucks. Happy fucking new year to me 😢