Rough sex

I love it rough in the bedroom and my bf “says” he does too. But all he ever does is smack my butt and it’s not even hard enough to make it red. Also I tell him I like to be choked during sex and he just lightly grabs my neck😒 like no I wanna be chocked out!!!😂 I’ve tried to talk to him about it but he says he doesn’t want to hurt me. Any advice on how to get him to be rougher???