I need to vent ...

I don’t have friends or anyone to talk about this I just really need advice I feel like I’m falling to depression... I’m 13 weeks pregnant I have a 1 year old baby girl ... I told my bf I was pregnant when I was 6 weeks his reaction was “it’s over” “ you got pregnant to keep me close to you” ( I had just started my birth control on November) when he told me it was over I packed my stuff I was waiting for him to get home bc he had my car but when he got home he said we need to talk and I told him there was nothing to talk about if he thinks I did this on purpose... an he left and took my car for 5 days I couldn’t reach my family bc I just had move in with him I was scared of how my mother would react and she lives an hour away I knew she wouldn’t come pick us up ... I stayed until he got home we talked he apologized we been thinking about abortion bc we wouldn’t be able to afford it I don’t have a high school diploma for a good paying job even if I try going back it would be difficult with 2 kids sense I wouldn’t have no one to watch them while I’m at school ... I been thinking of keeping the baby but I would have to leave my bf ( he has a 5 year old daughter) a while back he was talking with his ex baby momma about getting back together I confronted them and her response was we just friends and his response was I didn’t delete the msgs so I had nothing to hide it was just something to keep her close so I could see my daughter... then later on I found out I was a second choice Incase it didn’t work out with her I try to leave but i just had move in with him but I been so unhappy things haven’t been the same and this baby wouldn’t make a difference in this relationship I’m afraid he would try to go back with her again and how I’m I gonna tell my kids he went back to her ... as well he expects me to drop everything for his daughter when we have her I lost a job bc he wanted her to stay with us for 2 weeks and he asked me if I could watch her I said I’ll try to ask my boss for some days off and my boss said one week and I told him and he got mad about it I was afraid to say no ... and In a week coming up we are having her over and he expects to stay home and watch her idk if I would be able to handle 3 kids she doesn’t listen to me she ignores me one time she put a bag over my daughter and try to bite her she doesn’t do that to her other sisters how would it be with this baby I’m not saying if I don’t keep the baby I would stay with him bc as I have said things haven’t been the same I know in the long run we will brake up but as in if I do keep the baby I’m afraid to tell him the reasons why I wanna leave him his not an abusing person I’m just afraid he would want to take my kids away from me later on idk if in some parts I’m being selfish or in all of it I just really don’t know what to do I’m as well scared for this second baby I feel like I wouldn’t be able to do it I’m 19 years old with a 1 year old baby girl but I don’t wanna hurt him/her idk if any of y’all been thru this and where able to be successful....