I wish I would have never discovered my real father

So yeah I feel stuck.

I am 28 years old, a wife, a mother, a college graduate.

A few months ago a woman reached out to me claiming to be my biological cousin and she knew who my biological father was.

Now I grew up with amazing parents. They provided for me and loved me (still do). I kind of figured my dad wasn’t my biological father because he and I look nothing alike but my parents never talked about it and my dad treated me like his own. He was the first one to hold me after my moms c section. I don’t care what DNA says. That’s my dad and always will be.

Well anyway I was kind of curious and corresponded with this woman for a bit and then some aunts reached out to me and we corresponded for a bit. I wasn’t fully invested because like I said I already had parents and I had nothing missing in my life.

It was neat to see pictures of people I resembled and I did a DNA test and they are confirmed to be my relatives. My biological father and his whole family are very dramatic people. Like I live 10 states away and they still feel suffocating. Like calling or texting me every once in a while ifs fine but they constantly blow up my phone and tell me they love me and miss me like every 5 minutes. Like I told them I don’t even know them. I do not love you. I do not miss you. I don’t even fucking know you!

According to them, my mother and my bio dad were dating but when she got pregnant with me she moved out of state without telling my bio dad where she was going. (She then married my step dad while she was pregnant)

Well my bio dad claims that he has been looking for me my whole life and finding me is a dream come true. The way they treat me is like I am the prodigal son or something. He keeps trying to send money and gifts and make up for all the time he missed. He gets upset when I tell him not to send me anything and I don’t even know him. He’s like a stranger to me. He gets jealous when I call my step dad “Dad”. I am like at the point where I want to cut off all communication with all of them because I am sick to death of them bothering me.

I try to tell them to calm down but every day it’s like a cry a thon celebration since they found me.

I am trying to cut them some slack because I know if somebody took my daughter away from me and I found her almost 30 years later I would be a wreck too. But it’s getting to be too much for me to handle.

And the reason why my mom married my dad instead of my bio dad was because he was black and it was frowned upon. So I am mixed but my bio dad and his family are black. And I know this sounds horrible but they really act stereotypical black. I can’t stand that either. Like a lot of my friends are black but they don’t act the way my bio dad and his family do. Like sometimes I don’t even know what the fuck they are talking about. It’s embarrassing.

I am supposed to meet them in a few months and I really regret agreeing to. I wish I had the courage to just disappear completely from them. They keep thinking that once I meet them I will love them and disregard my step dad and his family and my bio dad will take his “rightful” place in my life as my father. I know there’s no way in hell that is happening.

I don’t know what I should do. I kinda feel bad because I am my bio dads only child but him and his family is way too extra. They don’t listen to me when I tell them to stop it. And if I just ignore them they will call and text incessantly, leaving sobbing pathetic pity party voicemails.

Can anyone offer me any real advice? I’ve tried talking to them and telling him them to knock off this behavior, and I’ve ignored them.

Should I meet them like I said I would?

Should I just change my phone number?

Help I’m going nuts here.