What should I do?

I've been seeing this guy since December 2017. We met through a dating app, started talking in November 2017. I don't really know if I wanted to date or a relationship or just have friends when I was in that app, so I never really told him what I wanted. I was "go with the flow" kind of person.

We started hanging out every Sunday in January 2018 then we stopped for a bit because life happens. He is six years older than me and has a life to live, so I was fine with it.

I think I started catching feelings for him when we made out and had sex (he was my first). So I was all over him, but he clearly wasn't all over me. I asked him what we were and he told me we were just good friends (about three months ago this is what he said). I was hurt, I wanted to stop seeing him because he clearly had no romantic feelings for him. But I wanted to have sex still... so I continued seeing him without knowing that I always want to do sexual things when we hangout. I gave him blowjobs in his car, sexts with him, etc.

Then finally, I was done with myself. I was in confusion of lust or liking him as a person. I never really gotten to meet him as a person, we were always just physically doing things. That's probably why he told me we were just friends.

He told me that we are in a different point in our lives, that's why it's hard to manage. I threw a lot of things at him (not literally) that I feel bad about (that I regret giving him my virginity.. and that he only used me for sex.. which he didn't). So I get why he would just friendzoned me. But I feel like I was emotionally dumped.

I still want to see him.. and start over. But I feel like it would be such a mess.

Thoughts/opinions please?