My mom

My family is on vacation (just Mom, two of my siblings, and me). Last night I had enough and I’ve decided I’m not talking anymore. I’m 25, pagan, and liberal. My mom and little bro are conservative Christians. A few days ago my little bro and I were discussing religion and my mom didn’t like what was being said and flipped on us. She basically yelled something about shut up about it and she just wanted a nice time. Well, last night my bro and I were discussing our views and we got on the topic of abortion and I was explaining my views on it (I’m not debating anyone here because my views are what they are, as are everyone else’s). I explained that it’s okay to have your own views but that it’s not okay to force it on others through laws and what not. My mom butted into each of these conversations and lost it.

In last nights, she tried to play on my emotions by saying that she guessed I believed my husband should’ve been “killed” then because his bio mom died giving birth. Then when she didn’t like my answer she said “let’s just kill them all right after they are born”. When I told her that’s not what we are talking about at all, she flipped even further. I don’t even remember what she said but it was so rude and pissed me off. We were going into a restaurant and I decided I didn’t want to be around her currently.

I feel like I can’t talk about what makes me who I am or about my views because it makes her uncomfortable. I can’t talk but they can about their views and religion. My views are so important to me and I was just trying to explain to my younger brother that his views will change as he gains experiences and matures, as I used to be the exact same way he is.

My mom ended up calling my husband up and threatened to leave me in a parking lot. She then brought up how much she’s spent on this trip when the trip was her idea and she knew how much it would cost. Now she’s crying the whole time and pretending like I’m in the wrong. I felt personally attacked and i refuse to let her or anyone abuse me anymore or attack me. I’ve put up with how she is for 10 days now, she is emotionally and verbally abusive and it’s been taking a toll on me.

My little brother was like “I know you won’t do this because you weren’t in the wrong, but it would just be best to apologize to her”. I flat out told him I will not apologize when I wasn’t wrong but I’ll just keep to myself the rest of the time since I can’t discuss what makes me who I am. She pissed my husband off so bad that he was going to make the 4 hour drive just to get me.

Now my mom is just laying around sniffling the whole time like she’s some kind of victim. she’s also lied to everyone in the family about what was said on her end. She claims she kindly asked us to stop... She did not, she freaked out on us and was like “how did this conversation even get started, why is it that you always have to talk about this shit” and some other choice words.

I’m so done and I knew she was going to bring up how much the trip cost. She came into a LOT of money, the trip cost isn’t even 1/25 of what she has in the bank but I’m always going to be indebted to her because of it. I’m so sick of this and I’m sick of her abusive behavior.

Edit: we were discussing it because they have been talking about their views and I feel that my views shouldn’t be off limit if they can discuss theirs. It started off by us discussing the types of people in politics now and morphed into the discussions above. My family talks about stuff like that and we enjoy discussing it and seeing the others views (well, I guess it’s just my brother, Dad and I that are like that). If she would’ve kindly said “hey, I’m uncomfortable with this, can you please not discuss it” I would’ve respected her wishes and changed topics. That is not what happened at all. I have an open communication with everyone else but I have NEVER been able to talk with my mom. She wasn’t even part of the discussion, just butted in. I feel that as family we should be able to discuss what we want to. My brother was genuinely interested as was I in the conversation.