Ik I need to love my self first

Leaving him has been on of the hardest thing I considered but I think I might really have to leave him alone. It hurts but at the same time, I’m kinda numb to the feeling. Last night I had a dream I lost my closest person to me. I think I’m jus afraid of leaving him...I love him sooo much but I love me more. I’m not in the position to b homeless so I been sticking it threw for the sake of my stability. But I feel like he doesn’t feel the same way he once did Nd tbh it humiliating for me to continue being in his face. His my best friends like I love tf out of him... he has asked for breaks numerous time and then when I’m gone I end up missing him Nd coming right back to him like a dumb ass. It doesn’t help that he calls and text me every minute of the day when I’m gone. idk what to do I feel so low with in myself, I’m so confused, tired, angry, sad... I Don’t know what to dooo.🙇🏽‍♀️🧘🏾‍♀️😐