I hate seeing my parents in pain.

My dad was having a hard time breathing and his upper back was killing him to the point he couldn't breathe. So at 3:20 am in the morning/night we rushed him to the emergency room. They ran alot of test, took blood, xrays and put him on an IV to keep him hydrated. Well they ran him through a big machine to check his lungs. They said everything came back clear for no clots, nothing. So they said it's a virus they prescribed him medication for the pain because it hurts him so bad he was having tears. Well when she was putting him in the machine she said he drinks alot doesn't he. I said yes and she said I can tell from this I was like damn that's crazy. Well they said his liver is enlarged and something about fatty liver. I think it means cirrhosis they didn't tell us that though but he's been drinking his whole life since 8 possibly he said. So I think my dad has cirrhosis. Please no judgmental comments. He's still my dad and I love him no matter what drinking problem or drug problems. I just don't know how to feel my so and I have been ttc for 2 years so far in August.Well he really wants grandchildren and I atleast want him to see my kids. Last night he kept saying watch you have kids when i past. I do not want to think about that ut makes me extremly sad so now i feel shitty for not letting him have grandchildren. He said he wants to see my kids before he goes especially since I'm his only girl. Why do I have to be broken! oh also that his sugar levels are high at 200 something. I told him I'll even go to AAA meetings with him but he doesn't want to go only because he doesn't want to talk.