Anxiety, OCD. Religion.

So I’ve struggled with anxiety/ocd since i was around 6-7 years old. I never knew what it was at the time nor did my mom. To be honest she use to think it was all for attention and sent me to a therapist which educated the both of us on anxiety/ocd. When i tell people about ocd they automatically assume it’s with cleaning, organizing or washing hands. Which isn’t completely off but its a little more then that. Mine happen to be rituals and intrusive thoughts. (Before someone judges without knowing) NO i don’t want these thoughts to happen & they truly do bother me to the point that i cry. To explain it a little more I’ll have a really bad thought of something bad happening and if i don’t pray correctly w,out being interrupted with a bad thought i have to re pray. Over and over and over again otherwise i think that thought will happen. I love to pray but i wish i could pray without it being a ritual and actually enjoy it again. I’m looking for some help and guidance if anyone dealt or deals with this? I’ll also have thoughts about the people that i love or God himself. Negative thoughts. And i feel like he’ll think it’s me if i don’t re pray. Does God know these thoughts aren’t me even when i don’t re pray? Does he know i still love him & believe in him regardless of what thought come to mind? And yes I’ve seen counselor after counselor on this, was even in a intense group and it still didn’t help. So please don’t comment for me to see someone. I love God and i know he’s truly with me, which is why i always feel the need to make my prayer perfect. But it’s becoming a chore rather then something i use to enjoy and calm me down. Now I’m going to bed without praying just so i don’t re pray which i feel is bringing me further away from him☹️ can anyone give me any advice on this ?