Anyone torn between work and staying at home after baby?

Question

My husband and I were always planning for me to stay at home after the baby is born, but I like my job (& my paycheck!) and I’m scared to lose it. I also don’t want anyone outside of my family raising this baby (I work long hours), so I’m completely torn.
Anyone else going through this? What did you decide? Any regrets?

Answer

I would love to stay home, but my salary pays the mortgage.  Most daycare is fine, despite the scare stories you hear.  My daughter goes to a small in home daycare, and it's been good.

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I’m sad about not being with my baby full time but not torn at all: I’m going back to work. I fucking love my job.

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I’m only 6wks so a long way off crunch time but me and my partner have agreed that i will work for as long as i want and then he will support me while I’m at home with the baby. We haven’t put a time limit on it but I’ll go back to work when I’m ready. Not when society expects me too. I absolutely love my job but I know I wouldn’t be happy letting someone else raise my baby x

Answer

We are in a pickle for this baby. Our third. With 3 that are 3 and under daycare will cost more than my check. It would be almost $700 a week and that’s right around what I bring home. I like my job and worked hard to get where I am. If I quit and stay home we are screwed with insurance because mine is way better than my husbands and my kids (especially the oldest) NEEDS other people around and planned activities etc. we don’t know what to do. Not even sure if my husband could afford to pay everything either.

Answer

I’ll be going out on leave for 10-16 weeks, not sure of the total length of time. I have a job that I love, and an amazing daycare near work. My husband and I make decent salaries so daycare will only be 5% of our gross income... 
I always thought I’d stay at home, but I think being on leave will be sufficient for me.. working gives my days a sense of balance and accomplishment. My job is easy and not very demanding. And flexible and family friendly. And then when I will see my baby at the end of the day, that time will be focused and full of quality. I’m looking forward to doing both... 
The only thing I’m not looking forward to is juggling graduate school as well, which I’m currently doing 😬 
Maybe someday when the child is older, and I’ll need to attend school events, I’ll consider a part time position somewhere. I really want to be more available during that time... we will see how it all plays out

Answer

Ended up going back after my first daughter was born. I am a teacher. I went back knowing that we wanted our kids close in age, and therefore, I would be home after our second child is born. Part of what we decided hinges on the cost of childcare for two and reducing my time away from the workplace. We also had both my mom and husband's mom watching our daughter for the past year+ while I went back to work. However, my mother-in-law recently unexpectedly passed away, which has definitely influenced our decision. I don't think there's a right answer...just want we are planning to do, for what it is worth.

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I have to work as we need the money but I would love the opportunity to be a stay at home mum. Could you work part time? Compromise?

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I tired to work part time at my job then decided to stay at home. One way to look at it is you’ll never get these early years back and it’s a very special bonding time with your baby! If you can afford it I would recommend trying it as long as you can, it’s hard but so worth it!

Answer

i stopped working to stay at home with my babies. some days i get bored but i honestly have trust issues with anyone other than my mom watching my babies. i also dont want anyone else raising my baby. even though i trust my mom i believe thats my job. and if i had gone to work i wouldve paid her for watching them because i dont think its her responsibility. so it wouldnt be worth paying their care anyways.

Answer

I thought about what would make me the most happy and fulfill me. I was a behavioral clinician with many hours to work etc. so I was basically will helping others fulfill me or raise/care for my baby?
I chose baby! 
Hope you can decide what’s best for you! It also helps when your husband supports you!

Anyone torn between work and staying at home after baby?

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