I’m not going to get into a whole backstory. I’ll just ask about yesterday specifically. So my husbands brother had his wedding yesterday. I already knew he’d be drinking because well he drinks all the time but especially at social events he drinks an obnoxious amount.

After the ceremony he posted up around a beer pong table for hours and moved on to whiskey after that. He didn’t socialize with me or his son all night. I spent the time following my son and entertaining him or chatting with my husbands family. At about 820pm I asked my husband about leaving since our son usually goes to bed at about 730pm so it was already past his bedtime. I figured his drink was empty so we could go. But nope he starts making a new drink then says this as his defense “it’s a wedding **son** can stay up late for a wedding”. Like seriously he’s not even two. As if he gives a shit about a wedding. He’s tired and needs to sleep. But nope husband goes off and continues drinking and debating with people for an hour or so while our son looks more and more exhausted. Luckily he’s not really the type to flip out when it’s past his bedtime but you could tell he was tired. I finally got him to agree to leave at 930pm so of course we weren’t home until after 10pm. When I asked him again his response was “we can leave whenever you want” seriously?? I asked forever ago to leave and you went off on me.

Now today of course our son is cranky because his schedule is all thrown off so I’m spending time keeping him distracted with books and toys while my husband just plays on his phone or reads. He actually made a comment when our son was throwing a fit about why he was so cranky since he slept in. I said it’s because his schedule is off and toddlers like having a schedule. His response was that he didn’t understand that since he slept the same amount anyways. Which isn’t true he got at least 2 hours less than usual. But beyond that of course he doesn’t understand because he doesn’t listen to me and he isn’t engaged enough to figure it out for himself.

So yeah I’m pretty annoyed today like most days (there’s a history of this behavior and worse). In my eyes he’s selfish and continually chooses alcohol over his family. He gets extra dickish when drinking. I just also have issues with my emotions so if you think I’m blowing it out of proportion just let me know. I’d like to hear some thoughts on this.

Edit to answer a few things: the wedding was at his brothers home. It started at 4pm and other people had already started leaving. We were the last ones there with a child. He was mostly hanging out with one of his brothers friends. He didn’t hang around his own family much at all so I don’t think it was about the wedding. I think he just likes having an excuse to drink and chill which is fine but I still think there should be a cutoff when there’s a toddler involved.