I wanna scream...

So, I know I shouldn’t rush it but my husband and I have been married for 8 months. We have been trying and trying to have a baby and each month when I start my period I get so upset. He has a daughter already with a woman who shouldn’t even be a mother. She’s a hateful woman. They just happened to get pregnant because the condom broke and now we are trying and I can’t. I can’t stand this. It breaks my heart every month when I start my period. I want a baby so bad. I will never understand why people who don’t deserve to be moms get pregnant but everyone who wants to be can’t. It makes no sense. I know I need to have faith and some hope that God has a bigger plan. But I want to have kids so bad.