Another box of tampons. Another "we'll try again next month". Another call to Mom reporting the lack of news.

I am one of so many eager women. Excited. And crushed mentally every. single. month..

I am one of so many who never really knew what I wanted to be besides a mother. Beyond motherhood, everything else was just details. I see a type of love I so desperately wish to give. But with the cramps, bloating, and bloody mess comes.. sadness. Sadness that one can't simply put words into.

Another friend/family member announcing their "surprise". Another invite to a baby shower. Another congratulations. Another painted smile.

Envy. A kind of envy that you feel in the deepest, rawest, most vulnerable pit of your heart.

How does one keep holding on to hope? How do you keep yourself from being discouraged?