Please work. Just... work. I long for this wait to end.

I ovulated and what a victory that felt like (much love clomid) but then my husband came home from work with a stomach bug. Man that poor man gave it his best... which as he puts it "was a piss poor ejacualtion". I'm laying here knowing we have done all we can, just as we have every month, and like each previous month I'm hoping the stars align, that the universe favors us, and we are blessed.

I'm not religious but if I were the hope and desire in my heart would sound a lot like the plea of an innocent child.

Trying isn't always fun sometimes its timed sex in between trips to the bathroom. Sometimes it hot flashes for all the days you're taking your medication. Sometimes it's expensive ultersounds and the clearblue advanced ovulation tests.

Sometimes trying for a baby is beautiful and full of intimacy. Sometimes it's dreaming of the future with your spouse. Sometimes, well all the time, it's saying things like "with our kid we will....". It's your husband mentioning to you how sweet every baby you pass looks as he squeezes your hand and gives you a small smile.

Sometimes trying feels like a blessing because you have found your person and you know how precious a gift the love you share is. Sometimes it's hard.

This past year I can tell you that I've learned why trying to concieve is called a journey.