Advice needed all opinions welcomed

Sooo I have a little situation on and I’m hoping someone who’s gone or is going through this could potentially shed some light for me and help me out a little I’m a bit lost on what to do.

To cut a long story short I have full custody of my first born son Joe due to issues with his mum drugs drink domestic abuse etc. scocial services and the high courts felt it was appropriate at the time for him to live with me and her to have surpervised contact with him, we set all the arrangements up in motion and that’s what happened

In the mean time in the background of all this I met someone else who can I add was fantastic with Joe and exactslly how I expected her to be with my son shes such a loving a caring person to add to this we had a baby not that long ago he’s 16 weeks old this week,

During the time of supervised contact with Joes mum she basically picked and chose when she wanted to see him and I got a little fed up with it working and all I needed routine just as much as joe needed routine to and she failed to provide that so she stopped contact of her own will November 29th and then got back in touch jan 10th this year. I wasn’t an ass I just told her to arrange it with a scocial worker and scolicitor and when they contact we can set appropriate arrangements up if she could stick to them accordingly if something came up just to give us a little notice rather than leaving us there for hours like last time and being a no show. So that’s exactally what happened...

Febuary 20th she got bored again after only being consistent for two weeks and didntsee him again. So I said this time enough was enough, and I expressed this to the worker who agreed. Time elapsed we moved I welcomed my second Gorgeous little man into the world and then when my second baby was 6 weeks old she got in touch again.... she wanted to resume contact again

At this point she went 6 months not seeing him no phone calls nothing so I was slightly reluctant to start it all up again. But my using my heart before my head I told her to get some legal to arrange this and we could go from there. Well once she caught wind of the new baby she became nasty and vicious( not a new thing) and I decided to cut all contact directly to me and told her to go through my parents to arrange this. Not only was trying to arrange contact becoming a financial burden on my self and my family but also the emotional stress it out on us when she failed to turn up or when she became nasty and vicious was to much.

In the background of her being absent she was done for possession of drugs and burglary to one of Joseph’s aunts and although I hate who she is and what she is. She is his mum however these arnt the standards I want to set for him I don’t want him thinking things like this are okay becUse there not. I mention this because this plays a big part of why she isn’t aloud him on her own not to mention her boyfriend is a danger to kids (mentioned in court). When I told her to contact a solicitor to arrange this appropriately she became really nasty and things that weren’t even to do with Joe.

My question is where do I go from hire I have obviously the child arrangement in place for him to live with me o am currently I’m the process of an anti malestation order. I just don’t want this to overspill and affect the kids that would really hurt and upset me if they were to know about all this. I have tried to keep this away from them, I know they will know about this as they get older. I know I’m doing the right thing but part of me feels guilty probably because she has gone down the guilt trip road before of “I’m his mum you’ll never take that away from me” joe has turned out to be such a bright and beautiful kid everything she isn’t in a selfish way I don’t want her and her family to ruin him.

My question is I guess am I doing the right thing by keeping him away. Should I try her having contact again or just keep her away?