Do you think this is fair?

Question

I’ve been working as a domiciliary carer for 3 weeks, I’m already being thrown shifts left right and centre which range from 12 hours to 17 hours. I’ve been out of work for a year so I’m not used to the hours at the minute and I’m finding life stressful. I’m 18, me and my other half haven’t been spending time with each other because we’re always tired or always at work and we’re being so so distant that I feel like we’ll just end up breaking up. Already my boss wants me to do night shifts starting from next week! So 10am to 10:30am the next day. I can’t cope with the pressure, she’s throwing way too much at me. I’m not even used to the day hours yet. What should I do? Because I do enjoy the job, everyone’s lovely & it’s great. But I honestly don’t want to be overworked. I’m a slim figure, tiny bones & I have low blood pressure also.

Answer

It has nothing to do with being fair or not, that’s just part of adult life. You just have to find your balance, weigh out the pros and cons, and decide if the job is worth it or not.

Answer

I don’t think it’s an issue of being fair or not. But if you don’t feel like you can handle that many hours, ask her if it’s possible for you to work shorter shifts or fewer days a week. I have always though people in that line or work typically do work the long shifts. I don’t think it’s the best idea because people obviously get tired but they seem to. Just talk to her about it and if she can’t accommodate and you aren’t happy or can’t keep up, start looking for another job with better hours for you.

Answer

You need to communicate with your higher ups about your work hours and how it’s effecting you. If you don’t communicate about these things then nothing will change. That being said, it may or may not do anything.

Answer

Your figure has nothing to do with your work. If you took the job, you knew what it was for. If you need work, you work. Hospital work is hard, you knew that going in. If you and your boyfriend can’t take a few weeks of not as much interaction, you wouldn’t last anyways.

Answer

My previous job was like that and I was/am a full time college student. I had no time to focus on my relationship with my fiancé and when I did have free time I was so tired I would just sleep. So I had no life at all basically. 
It really affected my mental health because I already am diagnosed with anxiety so the lack of sleep made it 1000x worse. I ended up quitting and honestly it was the best decision ever. 
There are jobs out there that will work around your schedule and not overwork you like that. If you feel like the cons outweigh the pros and it’s affecting your life outside of work then I would try and search for different jobs personally

Answer

You chose the job and so you can’t say it’s unfair. Now that you know how things work, you get to make the decision on whether you want to stay or leave. Before you leave, try seeing if they will let you work part time, but you probably won’t be able to change how long their shifts go.

Answer

Both my mom and sister are nurses, they work 4-5 shifts in a row doing 12 hours on. When I visit my mom for a week at a time she basically has no life during those work days, the day before her 5day shifts start she prepares all her meals and gets a good nights sleep, she also said going to the gym frequently helps quite a bit to be able to keep up and burn through some mental buildup from dealing with all those patients in the hospital. When she gets home she stays awake for an hour because she’s still wide awake from everything, has tea and a small snack then goes to bed. On night shift she said it’s harder to transition through, doesn’t eat large meals at night just carries around a bunch of good snacks.  It takes a bit to get into a good rhythm, make sure you are eating healthy and exercising regularly, look up healthy snacks that give you energy. 
Set up your coffee machine the night before and do not eat junk food it will bring you down! Talk you your boyfriend and arrange a day you guys can go out and spend together. If he really cares about you he’ll understand and help you make it work. Don’t stress you got this 🙂
Also you should talk to your boss about cutting down some hours, let her know your overwhelmed and need an adjustment period, come up with a plan to show her what you want over the next month or two. Don’t outright complain to her just let her know your having some adjustment issues you’d like her to help you with. Good luck 👍 Welcome to adult life!

Answer

In my country you can't work more than 12 hours a day/ 45 hours a week (even our emergency personnel, nurses, etc). I'd check your employment laws to see if what they're doing is even legal. It's fine to work longer/ extra hours here and there but not regularly.

Do you think this is fair?

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