I’m sorry I miss you

I miss you every single second of everyday. It hurts so bad that you love her now. I know it’s been 6 months but we were suppose to be having our wedding right now. I miss you at night when I’m laying in bed. I miss you when I watch fishing videos or something that makes me laugh really hard.. But I really miss you when I watch our videos. I love you still.. I always will. I wish you missed me even a little. I think the worst part is I can’t move on. Every guy I’ve kissed I pretend it’s you. Every guy that tries to take me out I go home and cry. The one person I finally did have sex with I sobbed uncontrollably after.. I miss you 24/7 and I miss your mean family that always made fun of me. I miss your hugs and your kisses and the songs you sang me. I miss our jokes and the spontaneous things we did together. I miss the feeling of butterflies. I don’t get that feeling anymore.. I really don’t feel anything anymore. I don’t know how to not love you. I wish you knew how much I love you and what I would do for you. Please stay safe and I’m still hoping it’s me and you in the end.