Selfish or controlling?

Question

My SO has always said that me (a SAHM) wanting to leave the house & do things with friends is selfish. I should put the passion that I have to go out with friends into my kids. We spend 24/7 in the house. I don’t think me wanting to go out with friends or even bring my kids with me is selfish at all. No one wants to spend 24/7 in a freaking house. I went to a baby shower today & I’m basically a piece of crap because I should be at home spending time with my kids & wanting to teach them things. As he says basically. My kids are 3 & 1. My 3 year old could do almost everything by 2 like sing his ABC’s, count to 15, his colors, some of his shapes, and MUCH more because of ME! So what do you guys think? Am I being selfish or is he trying to be controlling?

Answer

He’s isolating you. This is symptomatic of abuse. I’m not saying that he’s abusing you! I’m just pointing out that this is atrocious behavior and an unhealthy expectation, without question.

Answer

Ur SO is an idiot! Pure & simple! No, ur not being selfish at all!!! It’s extremely important for us moms (and parents in general) to have time to ourselves, away from the kids, sometimes. It allows us to regain some of our sanity, as well as our identity as people & not just as parents. It’s also important for the kids to gain some independence away from u, so they don’t have a hard time dealing with the separation. If he seriously can’t grasp any of that, then tell his ass to stay home with the kids 24/7 🙄

Answer

I mean do you go out like every day or just here and there? If you think he is controlling then get a job too and have him pick up the slack.

Answer

Tell him that he works 40 hours a week so why does that mean you have to work 24/7? No he is being an ass and you have every right to spend time away from your kids.

Answer

He sounds like he has unrealistic expectations and his ideas are jaded. You are more than entitled to leave the house and go on outings. You need social time, and so do your kids. There is no reason for you to be locked up at the house all the time. I live in the country so I don't go out and about often because I'm a ways from town. But when I feel restless and need to get out of the house, I go.

Answer

Nope. I can relate. 
I actually want to work but SO said wait until our daughter at least 2. He said he is responsible for work and taking care of us. 
We argue about this all the time. We also argue about me working too Lol

Selfish or controlling?

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