Can't orgasm!

I take longer to get off than my husband and it always makes me nervous because I feel bad that he has to work so hard for me. So I opted to get a "buzzer" (a vibrator for my clit). But with the buzzer at first it was overwhelming. Like I couldn't figure out where I liked it before I went numb. And when I thought I would actually go, I would pee instead and not be able to experience an orgasm. Last night we tried to get me to go without the buzzer and I couldn't. We literally spent 40 minutes trying to get me off alone! I finally gave up and made him stop too. He was tired and I was frustrated. I am worried that the buzzer might have ruined my chance to orgasm again. Is that possible? Will I ever get back to being able to get off with hands alone? I haven't had a real orgasm in about a month. I am frustrated! Please help.