Am I wrong...?

Question

So my dad wants to go to my doctors appointment. This next one is our 36 week with our sonogram. Tbh I don’t want him to go and I feel bad because when my mom asked, I didn’t really want her to go either. I’m personally just a very private person. I understand this is is their first grandchild that will be in the same city and state, but I like to also have the privacy of asking my doctor questions about my vagina and what not. Not only that, but I’m not a single mom. My fiancé makes every single appointment and I feel like it OUR bonding thing with OUR child, especially when he sheds his tears. I hate people touching my belly besides my fiancé, but I at least give them that lol I don’t mean to be selfish, but it’s how I feel. Am I wrong?

Answer

Not wrong. No one but my husband has been to any appointments and won’t ever. 
No one will also be in the delivery room besides my husband.

Answer

Maybe have them tag along but wait in the waiting room until the sonogram? That way you're still able to have a private talk with your dr to ask your questions and then they can come in and see the baby?

Answer

It's not selfish. Just explain to them how you feel. 
Maybe there can be a compromise? My SO and I let my dad come to one of my sonogram appointments because my dad was stationed overseas when my mom was pregnant with me. He didnt get to experience this stuff. It was cute; he cried; and he was super excited to take one of the pictures to his retirement buddies domino games. I would never want him to come to an appointment when I'm getting a vaginal exam and he's doesnt want to come. Lol

Answer

lol. how is this selfish? its not. tell them this and if they get upset oh well

Answer

I dont blame you at all. Out of all of my appointments ive only had people at 2 of them. Well the second one will be my next ultrasound but i simply told everyone else straight up that this is mine amd my fiances time and it needs to be respected. I dont tell anyone when my appointments are so that helps me a bit. Everyone has their specific reasonings for not wanting people at their appointments. I obviously dont know how your parents are but maybe just try talking to them and explaining why you don't want people there. Good luck!

Answer

Not @ all. No one except my husband was @ appointments and hospital. We didn't let anyone visit. Like you said it's a bonding time for you & your husband and you need to stick with your gut & to be frank screw what anyone else says...they will get over it

Answer

Have they done your group b strep test yet? It’s a vaginal swab. I know my dr does it at the 36 week appointment. So I wouldn’t want anyone in there if that was the case. It’s not selfish, you’re allowed to say no

Answer

Not selfish at all. Next pregnancy don't tell them when all your dr appts are. Just go and tell them afterwards.

Answer

Not selfish..this is ur and ur fiances time and now u r going to be ur own family and the rest of the family are going to be extended family.. Good time to set strong boundaries and stick wit em..they can see the sonos after ur appt...no one has come to mine expect me and hubby..and no one will b at our delivery besides us..my mom did ask to go to sono and when it came to delivery day she didnt even ask..she just assumed she would b..well she got emotional and cried but i stuck with it and shes over it now..

Answer

This won’t likely help you but I had to share anyway. Shortly after I told my mom I was pregnant she was diagnosed with cancer and was undergoing chemo from that point on. She passed away when my daughter was 3 months old. I’m now expecting my second and I’d do anything to have her there for even just one appointment. I know it’s not the same as your situation, just thought I’d throw my experience out there.
(Side note too, be prepared to lose some of your “private side” during labor and delivery, there’s no such thing then. It’s very invasive with random people in and out of your room all the time let alone invading your body in all kinds of ways)

Am I wrong...?

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