I don’t know how to deal with the pain of me having a miscarriage. A little back story first, when I was 19 my boyfriend and I found out I was pregnant but the I same day I found I was pregnant I started bleeding. I went to the er and they told I had miscarried, I was very upset but I really didn’t get attached. Well a year later I got pregnant again with my son liam, he turned a year old on oct 11. Well me and my boyfriend at the time broke up and I found a wonderful man, we got married and wanted to try to have a baby of our own. We tried for 6 months and it finally happened a few days ago. I found out I was pregnant oct 30th 2018. My husband and I was extremely excited I went to a clinic to confirm I was pregnant, I was 5 weeks and 3 days. I completely stopped smoking and everything. Wednesday night I started bleeding but it was brown blood so I wasnt considered well a few hours later it was bright red blood I went to the er and they said it was possible I was having a miscarriage. I went back Friday to have more blood work done and my hcg levels went from 1660 to 1180. I was devastated I cried all night long. I don’t understand why I had another miscarriage, I just don’t know what I did wrong. My husband and I already started looking a baby clothes and thinking of names. I can’t even look or watch videos of babies without bawling my eyes. I’m so depressed over this. I know I have to be strong for my little boy and my husband but it’s so hard. I put on a strong face and pretend I’m fine but I’m really not. Has anyone ever had a miscarriage after have a baby that was perfectly healthy? I just don’t understand.