Is he cheating?

Question

So my bf (we got 2 kids under 3) has been having problems cumin for a while now...it started w/my 2nd pregnancy (baby is now 9mo) where he’s like..I don’t want to hurt the baby (hence he had no such worries with our 1st...lol). He started sleeping in the guest room almost 2yrs ago bc he had to go to work ... anyway I was almost always the one initiating sex so he wouldn’t stray.. Now when we sporadically do it (1ce 2ce/mo) he cannot cum... I cum. We’re 37-him 39-I ... is he cheating? I’ve snooped on his phone but other than porn haven’t found anything.. Before the 2nd baby sex wasn’t as hot as before we had babies but now is like ..nonexistent..he’s like we’re old baby I work too hard I got anxiousness (he’s in real estate ).. help!

Answer

Idk, probably not. Peoples drive goes down. I would go back to sleeping together though. Intimacy is very important

Answer

Could very well be low testosterone.

Answer

He could just be tired and stressed

Answer

He could be tired, or his sex drive is low, if he's on medication that could cause it. Maybe he's stressed, or maybe he has an actual medical issue and is too embarrassed to talk about it so just avoids sex? I don't know but it doesn't sound like cheating behaviour.

Answer

Update... so last night we’re in the car and he whips out a pink chapstick he puts on..??? This is the guy that in 4yrs I’ve never seen use chapstick even when I’ve given it to him he’s pushed it away in disgust saying guys don’t use that sht.... here’s his explanation lol...

Answer

You haven’t slept in the same bed for two years?! I’m guessing stress, tired, overworked and lack of intimacy. You’ve got kids too. When’s the last time you two spend time together without the kids? Men need to feel affection and desired too. I’m sure sleeping in another room is convenient but it could have taken a toll on your relationship. Maybe it works for some people to have separate beds but i wouldn’t want my husband to end up being my roommate. Your stress affects him as well. Sounds like you need to talk it out and maybe need some time to relax and enjoy each other’s company.

Answer

Thanks guys! He’s on high blood pressure meds and I suspect he uses pot...idk seems like a hardcore decline I of course blame it on my post baby body he stares at my midsection a lot...idk they say sex is 30% of the relationship when is good and 80% when is bad:(... I really don’t care we have our family is what I care about but since we’re not married I worry...seems like all man in his family are on their 2nd wifes:( ... Life’s gotten tough physically(mostly for me, having 2babies in 2.5yrs, loosing my job, breastfeeding both took a toll on my body, sleep deprivation from having the babies in the room), nothing much changed for him that’s why if someone should have a sex problem it should be me not him lol

Answer

I wouldn’t jump straight to cheating although I know it hard not to take it personal. My husband has thyroid issues and has to take medication which in turn lowers his libido sometimes. He wants to have sex and initiates sex but then he sometimes just can’t get hard or can’t finish. He hates it and I honestly think it’s worse for him than it is for me because he feels like something is wrong with him. I just love him and support him through it and we just enjoy what we can and don’t worry about what we can’t control.

Answer

Is he taking any medications? If you went through his phone and found nothing then he’s probably not cheating. After me and my husband had kids he had trouble finishing at night but only cuz we are so freaking tired and drained so now we fuck in the morning or afternoon and there’s no problem w/him finishing. Stress has always affected our sex life too. Maybe he’s stressed.

Is he cheating?

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