Hi - I been with my ex for 4 years. He cheated on me multiple times but I have forging him. We have a son together and when I was pregnant with my son he cheated on me too. It took a long time for me to get over it and maybe I am still not because now I still have dreams, feel anger, betrayal and hate and sometimes love but then I hate myself for loving a cheater. The lay time he cheated was a year ago I found out he slept and met severa women in hotels. It was the biggest and I feel almost like I was going to have a heart attack. Til this day I have not gotten over it. He always tries to come on and out our lives but as soon as we argue from my insecurity he acts as if what he did is not that big of a deal. Now we are not together and I know he still still sleeping around what he that’s all he seems to care about ( Pussy) just all kinds.

Here is the “ oh crap” part. We slept together a while ago during a time he felt sorry as was coming in and out our lives. I still loved him and try to forgive for the sake of raising our son. I ended up pregnant and he hasn’t been there 1 time for me. Once he came when I was 4 months and wanted to take me to dinner and we had sexual but then we argued a week later and suddenly I’m trash again to him. I feel emotionally abused and sexually.

Anyway my questions is I have so many mixed feelings and pain that I don’t want to see him. I want to heal - I think it works best when cold turkey.

The problem is we had a 3 year old he he only sees when he feel likes anyway. I don’t want to do parent but I’m wondering if any one has tried to co parent while being absolutely heartbroken by the other parent?