My husband and I have been married for 6 years and have a 4 year old daughter together. We have been together since college and we are now in our late 20s.

At the beginning of our relationship we were both students and spent tons of time together. Even after we both finished school, neither of us had jobs that required long hours. Husband worked at a gym for awhile and then a 9-5 office job close by. I work full time too but from home. While I do the bulk of the childcare, my husband has always helped out a lot around the house. He also always (since our daughter was born) was the one to wake up early with her and let me get some sleep. He would wait until the last minute to wake me up and have tea waiting for me. As his job was fairly flexible, we would meet up for much regularly too.

Recently, my husband got his dream job in a big city, and it pays almost double what he was making. He now has a 1.5 hour commute and is gone from 6:30am-7pm (he used to be gone from about 8:15am-6pm). When he got the job I was so happy for him and for the changes the extra money would bring our family. With the increase in salary, we have gone from just getting by to having decent savings and we are planning on buying a house next year that we would not be able to afford without his new job. Since I’m posting anonymously, I’ll say that his salary is going from 60k to 115k, so it’s a pretty big deal financially.

This should all be great news, but I’m really unhappy with the schedule changes and the fact that I’m alone a lot now. It hasn’t been long since he started, so maybe it will get better, but I miss him so much. I miss all of the attention he used to give me in the morning and I feel overwhelmed with having even more of the childcare/household responsibilities fall on me. My parents live nearby and I have a bunch of mom friends in the area, so I have been out with them a fair amount while my daughter is at preschool. Most of my friend’s husbands work similar hours and they all seem to be used to it. I’m really having trouble adjusting, I just miss him so much.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Any advice?