Feeling alone

Hey ladies this is my second pregnancy and I’m just struggling with this one so much more, granted I was diagnosed with ( HG )Hyperemesis Gravidarum this time. I can’t stop throwing up all day at least a minimum of 15 times a day, all I can even produce is bile and foam due to lack of food. I’m nauseas 24/7 even thinking too much about food will get me to puke. I’m currently on medication but it’s a mix of sleeping pill so it only helps at night a little bit. I can literally only eat every other day the smallest bit. And I know I seem to be venting a lot but I have no one to talk to about this, it’s just me, my mom and my fiancé in this world. I don’t even have one single friend and I hate stressing my mom out because she’s dealing with a lot and my fiancé while he is sweet and supportive gets annoyed at me for complaining because he cant do anything. And my job oh my god are they hating me because of this, I work for a small Dr.Office it’s a family owned business so there’s really no HR, they’ve been so upset at me lately because I have to keep putting patents on hold and leaving my desk to throw up, they want me to show up for work everyday but god forbid I show up sick. They are DRs yet they won’t prescribe or try to help because that’s my gynos job. Today at work I threw up into the trash can by my desk because I couldn’t make it to the bathroom , it was bad and I couldn’t even get in air and while this is happening my boss walks by and says “can you not do this here? Go to the bathroom right now” like what did she want me to do pick up the trash can while I was puking and go? I’m scared I’m going to lose my job, my fiancé is extremely annoyed that I may lose my job as well. And I support my mom so I know that’ll be more stress to her if I lose it. I’m currently in my bathroom in an empty bathtub puking into a trash bucket. I’m feeling extra hormonal and lonely right now and all around I feel bad for being such an inconvenience in everyone’s life including my jobs.

Thank you for anyone who read my venting . I’m sorry for bringing down the mood of your day ❤️