I don't even know where to begin....here it goes:

My husband and I were high school sweethearts. As in high school there was drama; we split and moved on...young love I guess.

Fast forward 15 years later..my marriage had ended, his long term relationship ended and he contacted me on Facebook. We reconnected, fell in love... I swore I was never gonna marry again after the troubles and trust issues from my first marriage..well, needless to say, here we are married. Things for the first few years were amazing. He started a new job, made great money, but when he was home he was always on his phone. My gut was telling me he was talking to someone. I asked him, he told me I was wrong, there's no one and that he was talking to a "friend". Ok, I bought it, thinking maybe I am wrong...until I bumped his iPad..and there was a notification from a girl... I know I was wrong in doing it, but I did it anyway...I read the messages...how she should work with him at his new job, he loves her hair, loves how he feels when they talk...he was going to stop by her house, but didnt..talked about fantasys, and he needs to add her on snapchat, and other things that I rather not disclose. I took screen shots of the conversation...I kissed him goodbye as he left for work and acted like I didn't know anything..I was the perfect wife. We got into an arguement later that day, and I was pissed that I suggested he ask the other girl for her opinion....blindsided, he had nothing to say. We got home from work, I was set on him leaving, but he begged me not to end our marriage.

Now recent events: still on his phone constantly, no sex for months, no intimacy. My youngest son is in college so we have the whole house to ourselves. I throw myself at him..I'm a very attractive 40 year old. I'm at a loss as to why he is like this, and hes 39. Hes been to the doctor, and has a clean bill of health.

I went to bingo last night with a friend from work and he got pissy because I wasn't home to entertain him. He has no friends he can hang with and relys on me, whereas I'm a social person, I have a few close friends, but I like doing things outside the house where we (he) sits for hours binge watch TV shows. He lazy, and I cant stand it. I'm not sure why hes being this way, and when I ask him he says vague answers. I can go on and on about different things..bottom line is I love him, just not in love with him. I'm done with being the only one trying and not getting anything back. To add, this man has lied about our finances as well as other petty things....

Not looking for advice, just needed to vent

Thanks