Cheating, texting, the same thing?

Question

I have been in multiple long term relationships- about 3 at this point in my life. I'm 25. Every guy I have ever been with, serious or not, has either texted girls or messaged them on insta or tinder. If I had a dollar for every time I've heard a guy say "I'm just talking its not cheating" I'd never have to work another day in my life. 
Have you guys ever dealt with this? I am starting to think ALL men do this, even the good ones. Every person I know in a happy loving relationship has a story about cheating. Is this something you work through, or is this a deal breaker? Starting to think that if this is truly a deal breaker, I will NEVER find a guy. Can a man do this & still truly love you? Looking for advice from women in long term, happy healthy relationships.

Answer

No not all men do it. Good men don't. You just haven't found one yet. You will. Don't settle.

Answer

It depends on the context of the texts. Tinder absolutely is cheating to me. But just talking to other women if they are friends is fine. Flirting is when it crosses the line. But you need to be up front about it. Let it be known you aren’t comfortable with this in the beginning so there aren’t hurt feelings down the road. You can’t just expect them to know your boundaries if you don’t set them early on in the relationship. 
My husband talks to multiple women. But it’s just talking. There have been a few instances where women try to flirt with him and I tell him I don’t feel comfortable with the way the friendship has progressed and he stops talking to them. Open and honest communication is the only way to work through it.

Answer

I’ve been with my guy for 8 years and married 7 of them. He has girls that are friends maybe like two that he talks to but I like a little heads up that he is talking to them. I’m 26 he’s 27 
I think it comes down to if the guy is really the one or of they just can’t control themselves. We are both really open to each other. Maybe ask the guys like if you wanna be with me why talk to the other girls ?  I do know in some cases guys can sometimes get along better with other girls but just make sure they are flirting and stuff like that. My husband gets along with other women than some men like I get along with more men than women .

Answer

Me and my partner have been together for over 3 years he’s my first serious relationship and we now have a mortgage together. He only has one friend that is a girl that he messages only because she lives in England (we live in Scotland) and they play online together within a group of other people. He never messages her outside of friendly chatter, never in a flirting manner, usually about gaming. 
If he ever did message someone outside of friendly chatter and it becomes flirtatious for me that’s cheating. If you truly love someone you wouldn’t be able to bring yourself to think about another person in that way. That’s cheating with the heart and for me it’s a deal breaker. 
We have never had any trust issues, we have the same friend group for example on New Year’s Eve we were at a party I went home just after the bells because I was so tired and he stayed and got home at 5.30am which wasn’t an issue for me and I remember thinking “wow if this was like other relationships I know of the girl would be accusing him of cheating or have an issue with it” 100% trust is essential and if your man is messaging another girl in a flirtatious way then he’s an ass. There are men who aren’t like that. Find yourself one of the good ones ☺️

Answer

Nope. Not my husband, he’s loyal to the heart. I appreciate him. He does values me. He wouldn’t appreciate me doing that. Of course he thinks before he acts! There is Amazing men out there , you just haven’t met him yet.

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If they really love you, your the only one they should be talking to in that way... they wouldn’t even be thinking about it.

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I think it depends on what you mean by “talking” to other women. Because if that means sexting or swapping pictures, no. Don’t accept it and I promise there will be a trustworthy and faithful man out there somewhere. Don’t put yourself through the trust games and the worrying for years to come because they did something unfaithful. It’s not worth it. I agree that so many guys do this these days. I’m happily married, I don’t have to deal with the shitty men who take advantage of women because they all think they have the pick of the litter now that there’s social media. But I know women and have friends who have gone through so many men losing hope that there’s still good ones, and I promise there is.

Answer

Not all men do it. It’s cheating if he’s talking to them like he talks to you. Or even asks inappropriate questions. There’s female friends- that convo isn’t often and pretty casual. Then there’s just other girls where he asks what she’s doing all the time and saying he misses her(you get the point haha) not all men talk to other girls you’ve just been with some douche bags! That’s all. There’s loyal men out there! Don’t give up and don’t think it’s normal to talk to other girls!

Answer

No

Answer

My husband never talks to women or messages them. Hell he don't have women on his social media. So yeah you can find someone better

Cheating, texting, the same thing?

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