Cheating, texting, the same thing?

I have been in multiple long term relationships- about 3 at this point in my life. I'm 25. Every guy I have ever been with, serious or not, has either texted girls or messaged them on insta or tinder. If I had a dollar for every time I've heard a guy say "I'm just talking its not cheating" I'd never have to work another day in my life.

Have you guys ever dealt with this? I am starting to think ALL men do this, even the good ones. Every person I know in a happy loving relationship has a story about cheating. Is this something you work through, or is this a deal breaker? Starting to think that if this is truly a deal breaker, I will NEVER find a guy. Can a man do this & still truly love you? Looking for advice from women in long term, happy healthy relationships.