To myself,

You are beautiful. You are lovely. You are God’s daughter, and He loves you more than you will ever know. I know your family makes you feel like you are never enough. Just that everything you do is shit, and yet you try so hard and strive for perfection. You love making people happy. You love making people feel good about themselves. You love making people feel like they are cared for. You are a shoulder to cry on for everybody you know. Even though you help so many people, you have taught everybody that you and your needs come last. But they don’t. Make your needs known. Make yourself heard. I know I’m your life you’ve gone through so much shit. But after all of that, you are stronger than before. You love harder and care more. You are emotionally guarded though, and you need people who will fight to break down your walls. You also need to try to take the down yourself. You need to trust people. I know when you’ve trusted people before, they somehow found a way to prove themselves untrustworthy. And that has always killed you. You would never leave anyone, and when people leave you, you don’t know why. It’s not your fault. It’s never been your fault. Other people’s anger and hatred does not define you. It defines them. You deserve so much more. You deserve to be happy. And you are becoming happier. You’ve begun to trust more in God. You pray daily. You read quotes from the Bible. And this has made you feel so much better. You are reaching that point where you realize that this is the happiness you have wanted. You realize now that you are loved beyond imagining. “You are loved more than you will ever know by someone who died to know you.” -Romans 5:8. This is your new favorite quote. God is the one who won’t leave you like everyone else did. Things will get so much better. Within God, your greatest dreams will come true. I know you want those friends that are like family and friends you can go see whenever. It will happen. Just trust. Put all your trust in Him. You are an amazing person, and don’t hide that personality because it’s beautiful. Let people know the real you. The real loving, caring, amazing you. I know you pretend that you don’t care about things so people will never know how much you do care. But try something new. Show people you care. I know you have this tough girl attitude, and boy do you love it. Being a tough girl makes you feel protected. And that’s okay, but sometimes you have to give yourself the opportunity to open up to people that you trust. I know life has been so hard, but girl you will get through it. You’re so strong!! Just find the right people. Don’t waste your time with people that don’t deserve you. Your feelings are not to be played with. You keep them covered up, but sometimes it’s good to get them out. It makes you feel soooo much better. But never ever give up. Your too important to people to do that. You have never wanted to give up, but I’m looking out ahead for you. Life will get harder. People get older, issues surface, people pass away, and people move on. But you will get through it. Because you, are a fucking warrior. You’ve gotten through so much and will get through more. Protect those you love, and get to love people you thought you would never develop a friendship with. You deserve more and more is what you will get. You are you. One of a kind. No one can ever take that from you. God loves you. Your family loves you even when it may not seem like it. Your friends love you. You are worth it. You got this girl. Stay gold girl 💛.