What would you do in this scenario?

I have a friend who is married to one of my husbands best friends, we were never friends ourselves but I’ve always made an effort to be intentional with my husbands friends wives. They moved over seas last year and their marriage is big time on the rocks. I have regularly kept up with her, even though our husbands are not good at communicating.

I’ve wanted to be a support for them so I check in often. However, about a month ago, I got a really dark, hard message about the state of their marriage. On same day, while I was taking some time to phrase how to respond, I got in a car accident and totaled my car. Not my fault, (someone had backed out of a parking spot as I was passing) but I was faulted by his insurance and it was a total loss. I was horrified, shocked, devastated, grieving the loss of my car that I had saved to buy, etc.

Long story short, I crawled in a hole and cried for weeks because I felt really wronged and during that time, I failed to send the response message to the friend for 3weeks.

Now she isn’t talking to me and doesn’t want to keep the friendship open because I didn’t respond in a timely manner, which I completely understand. She was very direct about it and I just don’t know how to respond to her message. My gut tells me to just own it, apologize and move on without involving her in the details about the fact that I was in the middle of a personal crisis. I feel that’s an insensitive excuse because, ultimately, I wasn’t there for her. Thoughts?