OKAY! So! Story time, it's a long one so sit back and enjoy. A little back story, I'm 18, about a month or two ago, I got a new friends group, guys and girls. And they are all amazing people, I love them and we're all very cuddly. This started about three weeks ago, my friends were staying the night. Two of my friends passed out on my bed, so I set up a pallet of blankets on the floor to sleep on, immediately one of my guy friends crawls into the make shift bed and gestures for me to come join him. Which I do, cuddling was very normal for all of us. We were the only ones awake because two were passed out on the bed and someone else was being driven home. So I lay my head on his chest and he wraps his arms around me and I am SO comfortable. Then at some point amongst us talking, he started wondering too far to certain places for comfort and I asked him to stop. I then roll over and he spoons me from behind and starts squeezing me to him tightly, we pass out eventually. About a week later, he comes over again with a few friends, he and I were cuddling in the middle of the bed while the two others were playing games. He was petting my head and my back, he had the blanket over my head because I was laying on his chest. I was falling asleep 😅 at some point he started petting my face, my chin and my neck. I lift my chin so he can reach my neck better, I do this all the time, so it's nothing new. He then lightly grabs my chin, in that cheesy romance fashion, and kissed me on the lips. I was half asleep! I didn't react at all, he then asked if I liked it to which I just groaned cause I was sleepy. Then another week goes by and everytime he comes over we cuddle and he gets touchy, I just don't let him get too touchy (boobs, nether regions) and at this point he tells me he likes me, which was obvious. Then this pass Sunday, we were all hanging out at another friends house and we were all playing games. He was talking to one of our mutual female friends about how he hooked up with one of his exes that day, and I immediately get hurt. But I thought maybe it was a miscommunication, so I decided to text him the next day asking if he still liked me and I told him that I liked him. He never responded. And TODAY he came over! With two of our other friends. Obviously, I'm freaking the fuck out cause I have anxiety and I didn't want to talk about it in person. We get a moment alone he tells me he couldn't answer that question right now, and I said okay I understand. Yet again, we're cuddling on the bed, our two friends go outside to vape, I thought he passed out so my back was facing him. I then felt him sit up and ask where they went, i told him. He then lays down and starts squeezing me to him so tightly, then he starts the hand wondering again, but it's nothing too bad, just my thighs and stomach. He had started putting his head in my neck and breathing in, then he leans up slightly to look at me, and I say "I thought you didn't know if you liked me?" To which he responded "I don't, but this sure feels nice" and he laid back down. He asked if he could fool around and I said "if you don't know if you like me, then no" he kept trying things after that though. A couple times, he was on top of me, holding me, with his face in my neck, but he made sure I could feel him hard. Kept trying to grab my breast and ass, everytime i would grab his hands. The last straw was when his face was in my neck one time and he kissed and bit one part of my neck. It felt so good and I hated that it did, I pushed him away while grabbing onto his shirt. He was confused by reaction and i told him "that's one of my spots (you know what i mean) so can you please not do that" and that's when he finally got up. When he got up I said to him "while I don't frown upon people who do stuff casually, I have limited experiences and I wouldn't my first ones to mean nothing" and he responded with "if you're looking for something serious, I can give you pointers and route for you from the side lines" and that broke my heart. It wasn't even that I was in love with the guy, it was that things like this happen to me a lot, guys will just want casual, meaningless, hookups. It hurt because even though it wasn't what he meant, it felt like "oh i just want a casual hookup, that's all your good for" I'm still sad. And I started crying, just making sure no one could see. I'm not really looking for advice, just wanted to vent.