Moms.... is it worth it?

Question

Currently 10 weeks. After two losses, I’m struggling to be emotionally attached to this pregnancy. 
I’m constantly worried about giving birth, life after baby, losing my freedom and being “tied down” for 18+ years.
Part of me is like... is this worth it? 
I know it sounds terrible, but there are just too many horror stories about slaving away as a mom. Why can’t it be more positive? Why am I struggling to feel better about it?

Answer

I think you are Psychologically distancing yourself so you don’t hurt as much if you lose the pregnancy. The fact is you do want it but if you are negative enough about it then you won’t have to feel sorry for yourself. It is worth it if you want the child and I think you do want the child but the pain was too painful to bare. I would suggest getting counselling and try and relax. Once you start feeling your baby move you will fall in love with her/him. Take this time to heal yourself and yes don’t beat yourself up. We all put walls up to protect ourselves.

Answer

I haven't had any losses, but was really questioning it after I got pregnant even though it was something we both really wanted. I think my biggest concern was the unknown and just not being sure exactly what my life would look like after the baby was here and how my relatively free form lifestyle would change. I also was sick the majority of the time, and I think that made me really not interested in committing to this little thing. I almost intentionally distanced myself and tried really hard to not get excited until we got through all the testing to be sure everything was ok. I honestly didn't start to get actually excited until a few weeks ago when I finally started to feel a little better and was getting his room set up. I'm sitting in L&D now getting ready to have this little guy, and finally feel ready and excited to meet him and do this thing. I don't know if any of that is helpful, but I hope you reach a turning point :)

Answer

It is so worth it you are just worried about losing this little one which I understand I also have experienced 2 losses and it hurt bad and still does but dont let it stop you from enjoying your pregnancy as much as possible the thing is you never know what's gonna happen you just have to ride it out and see but yes it is so worth it having this amazing family you are creating the love I have for my kids I cannot even describe

Answer

You’re trying to find something to dislike so that if you lose this baby you won’t feel it as hard. It’s a coping mechanism. Just try to stay positive, I’m sure you’ll be an amazing mama!

Answer

I’m sorry but then why have you been trying to conceive when you don’t even sound sure you want a child?

Answer

I think it’s a normal process. You’re saying goodbye to a freedom you’ve had for your whole life. The feelings fade; especially once you start feeling your little one moving around and meeting them for the first time changes everything too. It’ll be hard at first, but you’ll find a way to get out of the house by yourself, go on dates, and see your friends. 
Honestly, in the grand scheme of things, it’s 18-20 years of your life. That’s nothing; especially when people are living until 80 and 90+ years old. 
Try to enjoy it the best you can, but don’t feel guilty for the sadness of saying goodbye to the only life you’ve known so far.

Answer

Yes it’s worth it. It seems like you’re trying to find something wrong with the situation because of your past hurts. Which can be totally normal today which can be totally normal to do. Force yourself to focus on the good things like the first time the baby moves, decorating the nursery, sweet baby snuggles etc.

Moms.... is it worth it?

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