I’m sorry wasn’t there when you passed away. I know you kept telling me you were scared to be alone and asked if I could spend the night at the hospital with you. I’m sorry I never did. I should have.

It’s been a month and two weeks since you passed away. Our siblings are somewhat okay.

Juan still blames himself. He thinks his bone marrow wasn’t good enough to safe you and therefore he’s not good enough either. But I’ve been trying to do fun stuff with him but I don’t know what 11 year olds like to do anymore.

Sofia just turned four. She keeps asking us to go to the hospital to see you. We keep telling her that your gone but she keeps asking. She has a whole container of candy for you from her birthday. She says she’s saving it so the both of you can share it.

Alisha well she’s not talking to anyone. I try but nothing. Mom says it’s her teenage years doing it but I don’t know.

Mom and dad visit you weekly. Mom went back to the hospital the other week. They wouldn’t let her into your old room because they didn’t want her to get all well sad. You were dads favorite and he acts like he’s okay but we all know he goes to your tree everyday and cries.

Me well. I haven’t been able to go home or visit you. I’m sorry about that. Your niece Ava is a bully, eight month old bully yes she is. I have a cat. I wake up Ava and zeke every night to make sure they’re okay like I used to do with you.

I try talking to the family but no one really talks to me back. I guess I’ll always be the black sheep of the family. I miss you so much. You never made me feel left out.

I promise I’ll visit you on your birthday. I’ll bring a blue berry pie. You’ll be 18 soon or would have.

Love you