.... I’m having a moment....

I’m 4 days without a cigarette.... doing great. I think about it all day- the fact that I’m not smoking when I’m not at work, the fact that I haven’t bought a pack....

.... I’m having a moment where I think I’m being tested.... my sister just told me she’s expecting again. I’m so unbelievably happy for her and I’m truly excited for her...... she is so worried about how I’m feeling. I appreciate her consideration for my feelings but I want her to be happy and enjoy this pregnancy. My history with infertility is what it is.....

...... but I really want to have a cigarette like I can’t even tell you how tempted I am to get in my car right now.....maybe I should go for a walk....?

Fml....