Graduation Party

Hi. My little brother in law graduates from high school in June.

I have a 4 month old baby girl and we live an hour away, but we will be in the area that weekend (at my mom's). The graduation party is the day before grad and the entire inlaw family will be there (87 people were invited) and they're pushy and overwhelming with my baby.

There will be a handful of family traveling that hasn't met our baby girl yet, too.

My daughter doesn't eat very well when we are away from home, and she eats even less when she is overwhelmed by pushy people and kind of hogged away from her mom. There's at least 3 people that keep her and constantly want to hold her (I understand wanting to love on the baby) and call me "food", which annoys me. They consistantly undermine and ignore my wishes. They ridicule and belittle me and downright do not respect me. Never have. My husband sticks up for me and the family turns it into drama and thinks I'm "tearing this family apart" when I speak for myself.

I want to be there for my brother in law, but my mother in law and some of her family stress me out. I'd like to introduce the distant family to the baby. But I don't want to be subjected to the stress of the baby not eating, the travel, and the pressure I feel when this family gets together. I also don't know how to go and not have the baby steal the thunder from my brother in law on his special day(s). Considering going to either the graduation the day after or the party rather than both... The graduation is late and will cut into my baby's bedtime🤦🏻‍♀️. Kind of having a meltdown over basically nothing, but please HELP.