Is it wrong to stop dating someone because they lost their Job?

Question

I’ve been in a relationship with my bf for about 4 months. Everything was good at first but then he lost his job. To give background on the matter, I was previously in a long term relationship with a person who could not keep a steady job and always had some sort of problem which ended up falling back on me to take care of. After that relationship ended I find myself being triggered if I have to take on too much in a relationship. My current bf losing his job is triggering me because I know he needs financial help and never can do anything without me paying his way. I feel terrible that I feel this way but I just can’t but that burden on myself again.

Answer

You are allowed to date and not date whoever you want that’s your choice. 
I personally would not want to be with someone who can’t hold a job or doesn’t work. But if they just lost there job and are actively looking for another I wouldn’t leave them. Life happens as long as they are responsible and looking for another then I wouldn’t hold it against them. Also I would take into consideration why they lost there job were they fired for not caring or for doing something they shouldn’t be doing at work or were they let go for another reason that wasn’t their fault.

Answer

Why did he lose his job? Is he actively trying you gain employment elsewhere?

Answer

People fall on bad times and it could be him today and you tomorrow. That’s not a reason to give up on a relationship. Now if he’s taking advantage of you and mooching then it’s a whole other story. I would give him some time to get another job. If he’s actively trying and not home playing video games then I think it’s worth giving him the benefit of the doubt. Although I do think everyone should be able to take care of themselves if they lose their jobs. Meaning he should have savings for times like this. I would be more worried he doesn’t know how to manage his money more than anything.

Answer

If he is actively trying to look for work then ya I think it's wrong. A strong relationship should be through good times and bad

Answer

I’ve broken up with someone before because they relied on me too much too fast when they lost their job. I’ve always had multiple jobs even with a chronic illness and have never asked anyone for financial help so I feel you. He can file for unemployment. I’ve always thought anyone can find a job within two weeks, it’s just whether or not they can let go of their ego if it’s not a job they want to work. I’ve done all sorts of jobs to support myself and expect my partner to support themselves. Not everyone may agree, but it’s hard enough providing for yourself, never mind someone else. I’m not saying never help someone. My husband and I moved across country because it was my dream and didn’t have anything. I found a job right away; it took him a few weeks. However, since it was my dream, I was happy to support us both as long as he was hustling looking for a job. But that was something we talked about as a possibility in advance for both of us.

Answer

Don't pay for his shit. You've only been together 4 months. You don't live together and you're not married, there is no reason for you to pay for him. If he can't afford to go to something then he shouldn't go because you shouldn't pay for it.  My partner of 2 years lost his job and I had to pay a few bills on my own the first month but he's found odd jobs while he's looking for something reliable. He went from being a head distiller to charging scooters, he hates it but he does what he has to do in order to pay his half of the bills so it doesn't fall on me. That's what adults do. We suck it up and find a way to work reguardles of if we like it or not.

Answer

Depending on his skills, maybe he should think about being self-employed. It's extra hassle, especially with taxes. But if he can't get a job with someone else it may be worth looking into. 
My husband was in construction which was great when there were jobs. But he had to count on getting laid off regularly when the jobs ended. He had a truck and tools, so he started hiring himself out as a handyman. He had tons of work, but no benefits. So eventually he got a maintenance job. But at least he was bringing in grocery money before he found another job.

Answer

No, it’s not wrong at all to stop dating someone who doesn’t have a job. I wouldn’t ever date someone who didn’t have a steady career.

Answer

Put your self in his shoes..... how would you feel if he dumped you just because you got fired from your job.

Answer

Are you in the US? Is he getting unemployment? Is he looking?

Is it wrong to stop dating someone because they lost their Job?

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