What would you do if you seen this message on your mans phone ?

Question

I looked through my mans phone. We have been together off and on for 9 years. Weve dated other ppl between the years. Anyways. He dated a woman for a few months maybe 4 years ago. She broke up with him and joined the miliary and has been gone ever since. He was kinda upset when she left ,i can remember.  So anyway. Looked thru his facebook messages and she sent him" moving back in 4 weeks!!" In which he replied at 5 am before work" thats whatsup! Excited to see you"  ..... Really? Weve lived together for almost 2 years and we have 2 kids together. Im heartbroken and dont know how to take this. So ill be a nervous wreck for the next 4 weeks. Advice please . and no, i cant tell him i looked through his phone.he will turn it around on me and make me the problem.

Answer

Well tbh you are the problem going through his phone , some ppl can be friends with a ex and nothing happens , he message was very dry ! Didn’t say. Anything sexual anything that even implied that he would cheat on you or is cheating on you ... can yal not have friends of the opposite sex ? 
Be more confident in your position in his life ... don’t second guess your self ! He is with you for a reason

Answer

If your not willing to communicate then he should probably move on anyways

Answer

That's a horrible feeling. This relationship is already in a bad place if you have to sneak in his phone and if he received that message and didn't communicate that to you. And even worst that you feel that you can not address what you saw. Nothing good is going to come from this. You're going to have to bite the bullet and let him know you violated his trust or that you don't trust him with what you saw. Either way it's going to be a wild ride. Just don't end up pushing him into her arms by being the overbearing girlfriend. They will find any excuse to do what they know they can't and blame it on you. The sooner it's dealt with the better. At least he will know how you feel and his boundaries.

Answer

I think it’s a little different since she’s an ex. Obviously they were more than friends at some point. I’d definitely just talk to him about it. If he has a history of cheating I’d be concerned. But if he’s always been faithful then maybe just tell him your insecurities that your feeling. You guys can talk it out and come up with something you guys can both agree on.

Answer

I wouldn’t be upset at all. People can have platonic relationships with exes. People can grow and mature from certain relationships as well. 
He can see her if he wants. They can go have lunch if they want. You have to be confident with yourself and your relationship to be able to trust. It sounds like you aren’t secure and confident in the relationship . 
Communication is key to every relationship. When you lack communication or when your partner feels like they cannot be honest with you due to your reactions to certain things, then there is a problem. 
You cannot resolve problems if the other person doesn’t know it’s a problem. You went through his phone, you found something you don’t like, now you have to be responsible for your actions and tell him the truth and ask him calmly about the situation. By you snooping, your actions already admit that you are insecure in the relationship. 
Communication. Sit down and have a calm discussion about it.

Answer

First of all communication is a very important thing in a relationship. You should be able to communicate and talk to one another regardless what the situation is. Also, trust there should always be trust without trust it is very hard to go on and be in a relationship there is nothing with out it. You will find yourself constantly thinking tiring yourself out with all these thoughts going through your mind. I feel like if you were able to go through his phone and find something you didn’t like you should also be able to talk to him about it, and save your over thinking and thoughts of what if’s and such. It will do you good and answer your questions.

Answer

I always said to my self for many years " I would never do what I wouldn't want my partner to do". before I do anything go anywhere ect I stop and think well would I like it if he did this or that !! and that kinda help my relationship.

Answer

The question is what would you do?
I would definitely talk to him and wouldn’t care how he feels about the fact i looked tru his phone, maybe make up something that i was looking for something in his phone & came across that message. But u should definitely speak to him about it & ask him how would he feel if it was the other way around. A ex is a ex this is not an old friend, this is an ex whom he was intimate with so those feelings could come back.. & he obviously has no respect for the relationship u guys have that he would even be willing to see her just even still having her on social media is disrespectful. You get wat u give so if this is wat his giving you and if u speak to him and he gets all defensive about it then give him a taste of his own medicine! Thats just very disrespectful he shouldn’t be having no communications with any exes period. & you are definitely not the problem he is for not having respect for you.

What would you do if you seen this message on your mans phone ?

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